p a i n t i n g
d i g i t a l
f i n e a r t
c l a s s
m u s e u m
k o l e k c j a
o b r a z ó w
k o l e k c j a
music video
p a i n t i n g
poems
c
l
a
s
s
m u s e u m
s z t u k i
d z i e ł a
Estimate: ... mln $
a c r y l i c
s z t u k i
d z i e ł a
d z i e ł a
d i g i t a l
d i g i t a l
d i g i t a l
works o f a r t
© 2023 ALISZJA D A R K. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
© 2021 ALISZJA D A R K. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
Kolejny projekt w planach, czyli moja piosenka "Real Theatre". Fragment poniżej. Realizacja wideoklipu dopiero po sprzedaży kolekcji "13".
AWARENESS OF UNAWARENESS
All fears slowly fade away
The worldly voices gnawing at my flesh fall silent
The more silent they fall
The more they manifest on the faces of people passing me by
Black-and-white (but predominantly black) people
Out of sheer ignorance of the existence of a satellite monster
Linked to their consciences
The awareness of the unawareness of millions
Really tugs on my heartstrings
Like the words of my old poems
F
R
EE
DOM
Najpierw, przez 10 lat, hartowałam ducha w DARK ROOM'ie.
Tam doznałam procesu oświecenia wewnętrznego i szerszego poznania rzeczywistości XD
Stąd wzięła się moja kolekcja "13", którą stworzyłam w ciągu 3 i pół roku włącznie z samodzielną nauką wszystkiego - od malarstwa w programie komputerowym, poprzez układanie muzyki, na montażu video kończąc.
Jest moc wiedzy na temat duchowej transformacji, różnorodność i brak kopiowania swoich własnych prac. Bo oświecenie daje wielowymiarowe spojrzenie i cel wyższy w przekazie treści ku wolności i szczęściu jednostki.
F r e e d o m
© 2021 Aliszja D A R K. Wszelkie prawa zastrzeżone.
i s
ŚWIADOMOŚĆ NIEŚWIADOMOŚCI
Powoli ustaje wszelki lęk
Głosy świata, które gryzły mnie fizycznie - milkną
Czym bardziej milkną
Tym bardziej malują się na twarzach przechodniów
Czarno-białych (z przewagą czarno)
Z nieświadomości istnienia satelitarnego monstrum
Sprzężonego z ich sumieniem
Świadomość nieświadomości milionów
Naprawdę mnie w zrusza
Jak słowa wzruszają mych dawnych wierszy
F r e e d o m
i s
o u t s i d e
ŚWIADOMOŚĆ NIEŚWIADOMOŚCI
Powoli ustaje wszelki lęk
Głosy świata, które gryzły mnie fizycznie - milkną
Czym bardziej milkną
Tym bardziej malują się na twarzach przechodniów
Czarno-białych (z przewagą czarno)
Z nieświadomości istnienia satelitarnego monstrum
Sprzężonego z ich sumieniem
Świadomość nieświadomości milionów
Naprawdę mnie w zrusza
Jak słowa wzruszają mych dawnych wierszy
AWARENESS OF UNAWARENESS
All fears slowly fade away
The worldly voices gnawing at my flesh fall silent
The more silent they fall
The more they manifest on the faces of people passing me by
Black-and-white (but predominantly black) faces
Out of sheer ignorance of the existence of a satellite monster
Linked to their consciences
The awareness of the unawareness of millions
Really tugs on my heartstrings
Like the words of my old poems
ŚWIADOMOŚĆ NIEŚWIADOMOŚCI
Powoli ustaje wszelki lęk
Głosy świata, które gryzły mnie fizycznie - milkną
Czym bardziej milkną
Tym bardziej malują się na twarzach przechodniów
Czarno-białych (z przewagą czarno)
Z nieświadomości istnienia satelitarnego monstrum
Sprzężonego z ich sumieniem
Świadomość nieświadomości milionów
Naprawdę mnie wzrusza
Jak słowa wzruszają mych dawnych wierszy
o
u
t
s
i
d
e
ŚWIADOMOŚĆ NIEŚWIADOMOŚCI
Powoli ustaje wszelki lęk
Głosy świata, które gryzły mnie fizycznie - milkną
Czym bardziej milkną
Tym bardziej malują się na twarzach przechodniów
Czarno-białych (z przewagą czarno)
Z nieświadomości istnienia satelitarnego monstrum
Sprzężonego z ich sumieniem
Świadomość nieświadomości milionów
Naprawdę mnie wzrusza
Jak słowa wzruszają mych dawnych wierszy
AWARENESS OF UNAWARENESS
All fears slowly fade away
The worldly voices gnawing at my flesh fall silent
The more silent they fall
The more they manifest on the faces of people passing me by
Black-and-white (but predominantly black) faces
Out of sheer ignorance of the existence of a satellite monster
Linked to their consciences
The awareness of the unawareness of millions
Really tugs on my heartstrings
Like the words of my old poems
NOTE:
"NIRVANA DANCE AT NIGHT"
Przedmiot: obraz + wideoklip (mp4. 4K, 16:9) zapisany na USB mini pendrive Aliszja D A R K
Technika: akryl na płótnie + wideo
Rozmiar obrazu: 40/40 cm
Do pracy dołączony jest certyfikat autentyczności sporządzony ręcznie na czarnym papierze
Praca posiada wartość kolekcjonerską
Subject: painting + music video (mp4. 4K 16:9) saved on USB mini pendrive of Aliszja D A R K
Technique: acrylic on canvas + video
Size of painting: 40/40 cm
The work is accompanied by a certificate of authenticity creted by hand on black paper
The work has a collector's value
Wartość/Value: 1 mln USD , 4,5 mln PLN
t h e l i g h t
i s f r o m
d a r k
I
Part of the profit will be donated to charity for animals harmed by fate or man.
Let NIRVANA DANCE AT NIGHT be with you! 🙂
[tekst po polsku na stronie FB https://fb.watch/j1DGkFGTRa/ ]
I created this work, as well as every other one on my website www.aliszjadark.com, especially the "13" COLLECTION (https://www.aliszjadark.com/the-13-collection) to give all people suffering from depression, schizophrenia, neurosis, bipolar disorder, etc. hope for recovery.
My art and my character in general are proof that you can rise from the deepest darkness (hence I am D A R K) - where the soul/psyche is buried alive - and feel better than ever before, of course, without taking any drugs that in my they are a huge obstacle, at a certain later stage of recovery, to self-development and reaching their own heights of creativity and self-awareness.In my opinion (I did the test on myself, so I can comment) drugs relieve psychospiritual pain, but they do not cure the cause of suffering. In the recovery process, time, the stimulus that triggered the reaction and my own work on myself and my goal played a large role.
I was in the DARK ROOM (see image no. 11 "ESCAPE" from THE "13" COLLECTION). There I died under the label "schizophrenia" that this world has assigned to me, not realizing how this label takes away from other people the opportunity to see me as I am today in reality and not realizing that behind this seemingly "abnormal "In this phenomenon lie the great mysteries of mind transformation and the great mysteries of love. This is my personal knowledge, because the internal observer has always been in me, despite overcoming successive stages of suffering.
From the beginning.The influence of the outside world on us, people with different sensitivities and different inclinations to self-analysis and drawing the right conclusions, is important.If, for example, this world rejects a more sensitive, and at the same time more assertive, individual, degrades on the professional background by reducing the job, disrespect at work, lack of a new, better paid job, then it is difficult for such an individual to burst with energy and a smile on his lips all the time.
In addition, if there is a private drama, the death of a loved one or the breakup of a marriage after many years, then a person can be overwhelmed by the baggage of negative experience and it is no wonder that in such circumstances he falls into, for example, depression, which can turn into later into various other shades and forms of "mental illness". The nervous system of each person works individually. Each of us is an individual natural specimen and each of us relieves stress and trauma in our own way and in our own time.I relieved my trauma and worked for a total of 13 years, hence the name THE "13" COLLECTION.
The symptoms of this trauma pointed to schizophrenia, which is why I was qualified to this disease entity. As we all know, this name evokes fear, distrust, suspicion and generally uncertainty and PREJUDICE. Certainly also with all potential employers ("please tell me something about yourself":DDD ... "hello, I am Aliszja D A R K, go to the website www.aliszjadark.com" :DDD) so I can't count on someone, after 13 years of my absence from the labor market, will want to hire me. Well, the more that this "schizophrenia", invented by a certain Mr. Eugen Bleuler, changed my perception of reality in ethical and moral terms, it even transformed my mind and brought out strength that I did not have before and made me even a better person.Not everyone can deal with this force now, because it cannot be so easily pushed to one's side under theories that my moral system does not accept or my mind considers to be untrue.Nevertheless, from the beginning regarding me and my trauma.
She was influenced above all by the man "the worst possible" - as he later described himself. He was such a "deluder and floater", although at first he seemed to me a warm man. He made me fall in love with him and he did it over the Internet after our first meeting in a pub, after which I was not sure about his outward appearance, which I told him. He reacted to this information with great distance. He didn't seem to mind at all, which surprised me. In an open and cheerful tone, he just gave me a link to his profile from the dating site where we met. I went back in and saw his picture again, where he seemed mysteriously charming. I fell like a plum in compote. All the more so because my object of desire, which he had undoubtedly become, began to keep me at a distance. This distance, after asking a very hopeful question: "Do you want love?", drove me crazy. Because you want a lollipop badly, but you can't get it.
The pain is inside. In order to somehow pluck this pain, my mind started "chasing a bunny" (hence image No. 12 from the "13" collection, i.e. "Microturbule Rabbit"). I became paranoid that in every person I talked to via the Internet, I most likely wanted to see and hear "When someone said in an email or 'face to face' a similar phrase or word as he did - I was more interested in that person. It was as if I was talking to him by association. My mind was obviously trying to compensate for the loss of being unable to 'catch real prey', so created for himself the illusion of spiritual, telepathic love, unless what happened was a consequence of my earlier ideas about this love, which also had its meaning in its existence.
Today, having gained knowledge and knowledge after all this 13-year experience, I have a different observation about love. Today I see how my former attitude towards her has changed. This relationship has taken on a new, much better dimension. More real and more human, in the sense that I pay less attention to what someone looks like, what clothes they wear, and more to what they are like inside. The point is that a Rolex watch is not the same as a loving heart.
However, this whole online relationship with him in other people also translated into life outside the Internet, at work, at home, with friends, etc... So the whole world around me seemed to be a single creation spinning around me and coming from him, all the more that at the second meeting, after two years!, where he seemed even prettier to me :d, he told me "I'm checking". And it was this suggestion that also made a big impact (see painting No. 7 from the "13" collection).
At some point, this whole "paranormal" phenomenon 😃 in my head became monstrous that I started to be afraid of it. Who is he? I asked, since he uses all these people as puppets to give me important information while talking to them? He was a real "big brother" in my life. It is impossible not to run away from this phenomenon/situation deeper into oneself. This phenomenon even makes you take a step back, isolate yourself from the rest, so as not to live in this madness all the time. You have no other choice. I had the impression of being constantly watched and checked (I was like "Schrodinger's cat", which I only recently understood).
It was this great observer associated with his person that had an influence on me, under which I had to bend, succumb, because I myself did not have a sufficiently shaped observer of reality, nor such strength or awareness.
This man, it needs to be mentioned, tied me to him, enslaved me even more, when during the second meeting he said "how many more? 3 years? 5 years?, let's do this sh, shu and together on a desert island". Bewitched by this vision of being together on a desert island, I locked myself in my house and waited for my beloved. I believed he would come. Professional and other matters were losing importance. I still had some savings in my bank account. Love was what mattered, so I staked everything on one card. It was a game and it was my risk and decision to get into it. If it wasn't for this decision - I wouldn't have fallen into this madness, so I wouldn't have been labeled "schizophrenic".
The more I locked myself in the house waiting for him, the more his "observer" came into my head. I talked with him. I was sure he heard me. Maybe somehow over a cell phone. And he was watching, in my estimation, through satellite cameras. That's how I started explaining it to myself. Hence my metaphor "eye of the satellite monstrosity" in the poem to image no. 7 from THE "13" COLLECTION.
How not to go even more crazy when someone controls your movement every second, in every activity, even the most intimate? Total madness. I had to overcome the embarrassment of what I imagined he was seeing and hearing, and it was impossible to hide. After all, almost a stranger. I didn't even know exactly what he was doing. If he controls me all the time and has time for it all the time, I don't think he has to work. And if he doesn't have to, it means he has some big business that others have to work for, and he's just drinking the cream - that's how I explained it to myself. When I saw this vision, I froze. I felt tiny, and my self-confidence was decreasing at an alarming rate, because at that time I was only a "seller", although I graduated from marketing (I also worked as a marketing specialist in the past, before there was probably even social media).
The Watcher was controlling me to the core. That is, the fear he created in my head grew to such an extent that the mind just hit some kind of mental bottom.Another thing to mention is the voices. When the observer locks you in the house under the pressure of his will and strength, you are forced to observe what is closest to you and listen to what is closest to you. You have replaced the voices of society in the outside world with voices coming from behind the wall, from your neighbors, right next door. You don't see the authors of these words, so you don't know whose voices they are, that is, you even think that he somehow sends them to you. Through some sort of satellite device. Crazy imagination: D However, these were not invented, fictitious voices. They are still there today, only my attitude towards them has changed to real, i.e. normal.
When I was pronounced "schizophrenia", I actually let myself be persuaded, I believed that these voices were imaginary and that they were fictitious and that they were the result of my brain disease. This information certainly increased the fear.So I hit rock bottom. I called this moment "mental death", which I mentioned in the film "Psychocountry of famous paintings", which I made under the Mission Art Aliszja label (you can see it here: https://www.aliszjadark.com/mission-art-aliszzja-movies- 2Mine).My life was destroyed because the illusion of "love" that I believed to be true turned out to be an illusion. He wasn't there, period.I wanted to commit suicide.
How afraid we are... we have (I stopped believing in God a long time ago). At night (2014), around 1:00 a.m., I got into a taxi and went to it, shaky. I remember checking to see if she was hearing what I was hearing. I wanted to know if the noise of the neighbors water that my ears noted was just in my head, fictional or real. At the same time, I was afraid that my mother would fall into the same psychological trap as me. That's why I didn't push as hard to ask if he heard the same voices as me.However, my mother decided to go and make an appointment with a psychiatrist. She managed with a nearby appointment, because someone just "fell out" of the queue, so I could be squeezed in. So I went for a visit in a few days. Your psychiatrist, psychiatrist? 😃.. she was very nice. Basically, I told her everything. I also remember saying that I had become a child again. Because I've really lost control of all "adult" things. I became dependent on my mother again, and actually at that point also on psychiatric care. I received the prescription. They were probably drugs for schizophrenia and depression. I don't remember the names. However, the effect was weak, even none, because I constantly saw in my mind to get out of this world.
Mom lived and lives on the 9th floor, so the option was there, but even when life was just a nightmare ... and emptiness and a nightmare, this option seemed unrealistic to me. Neither live nor jump out. Just horror. Impotence, slavery, depression. The worst possible. You can't feel worse and I knew it because I was in that situation.I stayed like that for some time, until the moment when during some therapeutic classes (where I literally started crying knowing that I was here for nothing), to which I was directed, the director of the facility, I think, decided to take me to a psychiatric hospital. There, the "elixir of life" was administered, i.e. a psychotropic drug that, when I got out of bed, I fainted at first. The power of his influence was blunt. Some time ago I read somewhere that there were deaths after him and that he has his other, dark side. Generally, however, a sleeper and stupor.I think today that the dose could be much lower. I had 200 mg, and from what I know you can give this drug up to 900 mg. I would have died after that dose. Psychiatrists, of course, have their own guidelines and stick to them, and a "dead" patient must accept their procedures, must submit to their will. Even though, if I remember correctly, my pulse reached 130 per minute then, that is, after using the target dose of the drug (the drug is introduced gradually). I lost weight to 77 kg. My normal weight is around 63 kg. Height 167 cm.
In a mental institution like at home :DD ... Joke.At least where I was, it wasn't too bad. Patients are different. You could laugh at some of them later, when I had already accepted myself in the years of psychóżki :DD and despite the life hopelessness in which I found myself.This needs to be emphasized now. The hopelessness consisted not only in how bad I felt, but also in the awareness that I was dependent on the environment, that I did not earn for myself, that I did not see any future to be able to return to someone's work, to someone else's company, where I would have be a pawn in a game of which I am not the author and which forces me to, for example, do unethical things or rushes me like a trained mouse. Yes, at times I felt like a mouse, the last in a psychological food chain. Returning to such a system terrified me. And it was actually this thought that made me even more contemplate suicide.
I've always been more sensitive than most people, I've always had a lot of empathy, but in companies and corporations (I'm educated in marketing and management, I graduated from university) such features are usually trampled on.So .. seeing no other way out, I adopted the label "schizophrenic with depression" being under the care of psychiatrists and my mother.I was in the hospital for about 4 months. The medication worked after some time, because I started to feel less anxiety. And if so, I was able to look at the people around me without being so focused on myself.And that experience was priceless. This presence "here and now" in the psychiatric ward gives you the opportunity to observe and draw your own conclusions. The fact that they called you a "madman" does not mean that you stop registering what is happening around you forever. On the contrary. The memory registers anew, and the new thinking is yet to develop, but later, after subtracting the drugs, which I did not know at the time.
In the hospital, I noticed that I gained some distance from the environment and that I actually have a greater understanding for people, patients and staff who have to deal with this "mess". I even kind of felt sorry for the doctors who had to make rounds (such a routine from time to time, "talking" with patients), although on the other hand I felt afraid of these rounds. As before every inspection - the tension increased. There were various therapeutic classes there. Mainly art and music therapy. While in the former you can be a creator to some extent, in music therapy you are a listener :DDD ... it means that you sit on a chair in a group of "psychic" and listen to ... voices ... music that the therapist sets for you . The music was nice and pleasant. Mood in a darkened place with an intimate lamp for high five 😃Half an hour and done.
Dinners were almost the most important. A man is simply set by nature for pleasures, even small ones, especially in a psychiatric ward. You want something to sparkle to joy, dinner was a mini substitute for this joy. More important than dinners, however, were my mother's visits. With her I felt the best, the safest, the coolest, even though for a long time, due to the felt resignation from life, I could not get in touch with her at the level of feelings, feelings. This terrible emptiness, even spiritual desolation, has created such a specific indifference to words, also we have. So what if my mother said something to me if I carried the belief that everything no longer made sense. None of the words made sense then either. Someone could tell me "you'll see, you'll be dancing again" and I wouldn't believe it.
Faith plays an important role in all of this. The faith that died with me died as a result of some rejection by the outside world (that's how I felt). This lesson builds distance. Distance to people, their promises, their games. Today I do not trust so easily and naively, I rely more on faith in my own abilities, which I discovered over time. So I built my faith anew, in a different dimension and concept. This took more time and my own work.I was a little afraid to go home from the psychiatric ward because I didn't know what would happen next. Especially the financial sphere was on my mind and my future related to it. I live with my parents with my cats. If it wasn't for the psychotropics, which had a sleep-inducing and even stupefying effect until noon, which at the time I thought was the result of the disease, it would have been not so bad.
I felt like my best friend with my mother. We traveled everywhere together. For shopping, to the cinema, etc. And although it was seemingly fun, there were questions in the back of my mind: what if she was gone? How am I going to cope if I don't have full control over my life because I've lost it? So that fear and some despair was still sitting there. It was dormant with medication, but it was there. The root cause 🙂One day, I remember someone, I think a friend, asked me in an e-mail if I was already off these drugs. And this question provoked me, it gave me that sandpiper I mentioned at the beginning, to make the decision to stop taking drugs.I did it without the doctor's knowledge and at my own risk. The doctor was always against reducing the dose, let alone discontinuing the drug. I understood that because a patient would commit suicide. But I felt that would never happen again. I took a risk myself. I also didn't like spending money on prescriptions. Because I didn't have too many of them myself, and I needed them for the purpose that began to form in my head.
The brain, after taking off the drugs, began to thaw. As if thaws came after winter. Suddenly, that sense of dullness, of being weighed down in the head, of reluctance, of heaviness, began to disappear. I was very surprised that what I was feeling before was not the result of the disease, but of the drugs. I wondered how it was possible that I had lived without this knowledge for so long and that no one had made me aware of this truth. At that time, I was very pissed off at the manufacturer of this drug that I wanted to take the matter to court. However, I gave up and took up creative work. I continued to thaw. I started sweating a lot. Changing shirts every now and then. I understood that it was normally some sort of detox. At the same time, there were arguments with my parents, who feared that my new actions were the result of the disease and that the risk of the worst recurrence due to discontinuation of medication was very high.
My nervous system was deprived of some "protective" coat, so the nerves began to work. I just started to feel annoyed, but also lively fear. More than one person would be scared of this situation, so they would certainly go back to medication. However, I decided to persist. I thought then that if I go back to medication after this screeching, it will be like an alcoholic who would go back to drinking after detox. No way, especially since I still felt different than before the total mental collapse. Even so, I already felt a different kind of strength within me.
At the same time, I heard the infrasound again, a voice that I linked back to that man I had fallen head over heels in love with. Oh, schizophrenia is back...But it was a different stage. The association this time was not so destructive, i.e. the level of fear it caused was lower, and there was even a feeling that allowed me to take new actions.I sat down at the computer to draw. I've always liked doing it before, for my own pleasure.So I opened a program called Paint. It was at the turn of 2018/2019.
This time I started drawing differently. As if with the purpose of telling what was happening inside me, and then also - what my new mind's eye saw. It is not without reason that in my Facebook photo I have a white dot drawn on my forehead in a black square (image 10). It is a symbol of my transformation of consciousness on the way FROM and TO the external world. A symbol of self-awareness and enlightenment in the DARK ROOM :D:D, a symbol of the transformation of the mind towards its own strength built on its own knowledge :D:DIt is surprising and unbelievable that relatively recently, in the 1940s and 1950s, attempts were made to use labotomy as a treatment method for schizophrenia. Unfortunately, it is from deep ignorance, ignorance and lack of self-knowledge what this spiritual ride really is. schizophrenia.
To this day, as I read, psychosurgery is used to treat mental disorders, which in my opinion is even an anomaly. How can a patient's impotence in taking control over reality be surgically cured, i.e. a doctor exercising control over a human spirit/psyche/mentality?? Incentive!! :D:DI developed my creativity. I sat with her all day and almost all night. Mom was very upset about it. Even though I tried to explain to her not to worry, because I have new strength and energy in me. She did not believe my words, which is why there were quarrels. At some point I was afraid that my parents would force me to be locked up in a psychiatric hospital or force me to take psychotropics. If that happened, I'd be devastated. Fortunately, that didn't happen. I think, in retrospect, that the great drama of some people considered mentally ill is forcing them to do anything. Even to swallow pills in a closed ward when the patient does not want to do it.
I was also afraid then that my mother would forbid me to approach the computer, where I got angry when something didn't work out (swearing like never before), so I decided to move out to my apartment with the cats that we gave to a couple of students from my extended family. Because it just so happened that they needed a place to live in my city, where they went to college. I thought it would be best for us. After all, I had some money in my bank account from old savings, and a pension that the state had granted me. It was small, but it was.
First, I started with the chores. I messed up kitchen cabinets, bathroom, floors, etc., etc. There was some excitement and fear. The other one was still with me. Once it was so powerful that I thought I was going to go mental again like before. Then I reached for the drug hesitantly, but ... I literally took a crumb of the whole tablet. And this crumb immediately affected the nervous structures. I could even feel its effect on my brain. Pyk and in a moment I sailed away, that is, I went to the land of dreams. And that was the last time I put a psychotropic in my mouth. After that I didn't take anything else.
I dealt with my anxiety and depression on my own. I noticed in myself features of neurosis and bipolar affective disorder. However, the more I delved into my art, the more I built myself from the inside. I became even stronger. So my level of strength was dependent on the progress of my creative work.How I felt and how I perceived the outside world and the voices that existed in the new version was directly proportional to the results achieved in my creative self-development.Of course, an outsider doesn't have to like my art when they see it on my website, but the question was whether I liked the result. The point was that it was my SELF that had to be in control of my own work, it had to be certain of this work and independent of the opinions of the environment. Only then is such a work real.
First, my animated films were created under the aforementioned "Mission Art Aliszja" label. I uploaded them on YouTube. Personally, I liked my comedy "Where two fight, the animal benefits" the most because of the dialogues I created and which I laughed at the same time. Of course, after I saw the number of views, I felt worse, but I knew I couldn't lie down. I walked on leaving YouTube.Then I started working on THE "13" COLLECTION. First there were pictures (digital darkpainting), then poems to these pictures, finally video clips with my music and performance. I practically did everything in one place, which shows the power of my imagination.In the meantime, the text of my song "Real Theater" was also created, which you can listen to in the footer - at the very bottom of the page. The music for this text was created by someone else on my behalf. Any other music in my offer with images is already mine, as are the music videos.
In general, what I have done so far in the final version is shown on my website www.aliszjadark.com, which I also created myself and which was a big IT challenge. Nobody taught me anything. I figured it out on my own after lots of trial and error. It was a great intellectual and spiritual effort. Big drops in energy, i.e. depressions and booms and considerable sacrifices. Because since I started creating, I'm practically sitting in one and the same place, in my DARK ROOM built on my whole philosophy of spiritual transformation.It's been a good few years since the beginning of 2019, and it was no different before. This means that there were no holidays, trips, New Year's Eve balls, etc., etc. From 2014, a psychiatrist, and then a flat with my parents (only once I went to the mountains with an old friend to see what impressions and feelings I would have, it was ok), and later DARK ROOM.
I think I did what Salvador Dali said:"Beings without imagination feel the need to travel around the world or wait for a European war in order to imagine hell. For me it was enough to stay where I was and stumble upon a snot, and a snot only alleged."That is why I read The Burning Giraffe so well, in which there is a "mad creature" in the background and a woman in the foreground who falls under the pressure of the revealed truth and who is born again, in the background, in the triumph of her own enlightened self. Dali knew this from his own experience, as evidenced by this painting. And the proof of my knowledge is all my art on my site, especially THE "13" COLLECTION.
I am sitting in the DARK ROOM today and I have inner peace being alone with myself, united enough with my own last observer of reality, although forgetting that I have it. He, that is "beloved" has not come so far, but I do not look forward to it as before (I am no longer his slave). It is the power of self-love and perhaps learning to give freedom to another human being.I used to be intrusive with my feelings, imposing, "woman ivy" 😃, today I have this distance. It's not so easy to get me into your tricks either. So I became immune to the outside world. Also to the hate I encountered on the Internet after setting up my Facebook account.In general, today I open Fb, and there ... schizophrenia :D:D. Luckily not mine anymore.By entering my website, the prices of my paintings may seem unreal to most people, crazy, etc., etc. But they are not real.First of all, I will not be able to count on retirement, because pension contributions are too low. The pension itself is too small for a normal life.
Secondly, I want to repay you a debt, i.e. the cost of the annuity. Nearly a third of the sales tax will definitely go towards a pension for other or needy animals in shelters.Thirdly, I want to buy a house or a plot with a garden, so that I can safely let my cats out on the grass, which need it, like a fish needs water. Cats and dogs have their natural needs and if these needs cannot be provided to them, they are also unhappy as humans, although they cannot articulate it to us. They show it in a different way, which I have observed well.
Fourthly, not every price is adjusted to the art market in our country. In the West, the prices of works run into millions of dollars. Someone shapes them. I see no reason why I can't determine the value of my own works of art (regardless of whether I sell them or not), especially after what I experienced, what I saw and what I got up from. It is also a sign of self-love. The work was long, intense, full of tension and struggle. It was a direct result of this spiritual ride - first down, then up. However, if I had committed suicide in 2014, this play would not have been made. If I hadn't taken care of myself at a later time, stopped taking medication at a huge risk - there would be no art. Therefore, the price of these works is also the price of my new life and an example in it, for all people suffering from depression, schizophrenia, etc., that it is possible to win with these life "accidents" and that it is always worth awakening your own will to this life, looking for your own way, even if it lasted longer than mine.
Resurrection/enlightenment exists. Let NIRVANA DANCE AT NIGHT be with you.
Cena: 4,5 mln PLN